Wednesday, March 5, 2008

When Walls are Hands

Even though my mother liked to yell and scream
and threaten to beat me when I did it,
sometimes I miss writing on my hands.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I recognize the hand in the picture. It's the hand model guy from Seinfeld who fell in love with his hand.

[Setting: A photographer's studio]

(George is holding out his hands while a man and woman marvel at them. A photographer is fooling around with a camera towards the right wall)

MAN: I've never seen hands like these before..

WOMAN: They're so soft and milky white.

PHOTOGRAPHER: You know who's hands they remind me of? (Pauses for effect) Ray McKigney.

(The woman nods as the man looks off into space)

MAN: Ugh.. Ray.

PHOTOGRAPHER: He was it.

GEORGE: Who was he?

PHOTOGRAPHER: The most exquisite hands you've ever seen.. Oh, he had it all.

GEORGE: (Hands still out, even though they've stopped looking at them) What happened to him?

(Obviously a touchy subject, the woman coyly walks over to the photographer, and they both occupy themselves. The man is left to tell George the answer to his

question)

MAN: (Clears throat) Tragic story, I'm afraid. He could've had any woman in the world.. but none could match the beauty of his own hand.. and that became his

one true love..

(Long pause)

GEORGE: You mean, uh..?

MAN: Yes. he was not.. master of his domain.

GEORGE: (Makes a gesture saying he understands. The man nods) But how.. uh..?

MAN: (Quick, to the point) The muscles.. became so strained with.. overuse, that eventually the hand locked into a deformed position, and he was left with nothing

but a claw. (Holds hand up, displaying a claw-like shape) He traveled the world seeking a cure.. acupuncturists.. herbalists.. swamis.. nothing helped. Towards the

end, his hands became so frozen the was unable to manipulate utensils, (Visibly disgusted by this last part) and was dependent on Cub Scouts to feed him. I hadn't

seen another pair of hands like Ray McKigney's.. until today. You are his successor. (George looks down at his hands) I.. only hope you have a little more

self-control.

GEORGE: (Smiling to himself) You don't have to worry about me. (Nodding, gloating) I won a contest.

kate lacroix said...

i am sending you a sharpie immediately. you are an adult now and can do what you want.

margot said...

i was told i would get ink poisoning if i wrote on myself by l.m. and just found out fairly recently that that's not true...lol!

Linsey said...

i was told by my mom too! (ink poisoning)... so until right now i believed it.... thanks for the info mm!!!

little miss mel said...

what a great picture.

I think one of the only things I wrote on my hand was my Latin vocab words. Hey, I wasn't proud, just a tad desperate. :D