Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Nigerian Aftermath

So, I've finally gotten my life--er, I mean my hotmail--back. After five days of not being able to log in and whole lot of hullabaloo from the folks at the "help desk," I was happy to find about a million junkmail messages. Yes, I can get meds from Canada and claim my 75,000 pounds from the UK Lotto Board! Both with just a single click of the mouse!

Interestingly, I was also able to go to my Trash folder and see the responses sent by my contacts to the scammers. There was someone (thank you, Jason Miller!) who was actually concerned about my wellbeing; there were many who wanted to let me know I had clearly been phished. An old college friend wrote saying she had been on vacation and hoped all was well for me besides the Nigerian mishap; an old crush warned me of the lack of good prenatal care in Abuja.

My very favorite, however, was this gem from my mother-in-law:


I am here to help, you must leave now and make your way South down the Niger River any way you can till you reach the town Oguta Owerri, at the train station there will be a locker number 77 use you birthday dates for the code to open the locker there will be a ticket in your name going to Port Harcourt , you may have to hitch hike (be careful just a little bit farther) go to a coastal town named Opobo, there will be a small hotel called Nigeria Suites in the lobby a handsome Peruvian man in a red shirt with NY Yankees logo will meet you to give you the $4000. I know you are good for the loan we will settle up in July.

Love Paula

Brilliant, huh? I love this woman! As far as I can tell, no one forked over the big bucks, but for that, I'm still willing to forgive.


Anonymous said...

Lovin' your MIL~

Joe Hefner said...

hahahaha....I love it. Why can't I think like that?

Anonymous said...

Go, Paula!! Very Good, I, like Joe, wish i had thought of that. see you in a couple days. (Nicole +Paula)